Train

"Do you hear that?"

I stopped and listened. I did hear it; the faint rumbling of a train far away down the tracks. I kicked the rail. "I don't hear anything," I said irritably.

He looked at me gravely. "What are you going to do when it gets here?"

"I told you, I don't hear anything."

"Denial won't help you, Jez."

I wanted to cry, so I turned away from him and balanced myself on the rail. It vibrated gently. He sighed behind me, which only made me want to cry more.

"I'm sorry, Jez, but you knew this was going to come one day."

"No, I didn't."

"We talked about it."

"No, we didn't."

"I have to go."

"No, you don't."

I turned around and stared at him. He looked sad, with his hands in his pockets and his hair blowing around in the odorless breeze. The light was pale and filtered, sliding down through the clouds to an earth that ungratefully ate up the warmth.

"You don't have to go," I repeated.

"I have to."

"Stay with me," I said, my voice suddenly pleading. My eyes stung and a tear streaked out, rebellious and boiling. My hands clenched into fists and my nails bit into my palms.

He just looked sad. I turned away again so I could cry without him seeing me.

The rumbling was getting louder. My shoes shook on the rail.

"Get down, Jez."

"No."

The train screamed out a warning. I ran my sleeve across my eyes angrily.

He touched my shoulder. "Jez--"

I whirled around, prepared to shout at him or push him away, but he grabbed me and held me tight and I closed my eyes and cried against him.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly.

The train screeched again, and he picked me up and carried me away from the tracks.

"Jez, please don't cry," he said, gripping my shoulders. "I'll be back. I promise. You know that."

I kept crying and didn't look up at him. I curse myself for my feminine heart and the way I cry.

"Jez."

The train came around the bend, and I hated it.

"Jez, look at me."

"No." My voice sounded muffled and raw.

"Please."

I raised my eyes to his, somewhat defiantly. He still looked sad. Well, I was the one crying, so I didn't have much sympathy for him. He was the one leaving me.

"I love you, Jez."

I started crying anew. He hugged me again. "I'll be back," he murmured.

"Promise?"

"I promise you."

And so the train took him away, and I still stand next to the rails, and wait.